Friday, April 20, 2012

Self-Bullying: Fight a Bully Within

Psychology Today: "Bullies couldn't exist without victims, and they don't pick on just anyone; those singled out lack assertiveness and radiate fear long before they ever encounter a bully. No one likes a bully, but no one likes a victim either..."
You know how bad it feels when another person negatively judges you. It's awful. 
How does negative self-judgment make you feel? Each time you call yourself stupid, ugly, not good enough, etc you are taking positive energy from yourself.  
Have you ever negatively judged yourself? Ever compare yourself to others? 
This is self-bullying.




How to Cancel Out All the Negative Judgments


"Take your index finger and press it to your thumb like you were squishing a piece of dirt between those fingers. Now, each time you make a negative judgement about others or yourself, press those fingers together and squish out that negativity. Immediately  replace the negative judgement with a positive statement. The more you do this the easier it will be to not make negative judgments at all. Practice, practice, practice and it's ll get easier over time..."


-Hey U.G.L.Y, non-profit organization founded in response to the daily headlines describing the increase in teen suicide, gun violence in schools, bullying, drug abuse, eating disorders, and the obesity epidemic facing American youth. 



Building Confidence Thru Play

The Goddard School, Gilbertsville. Playful learning activities are teacher-planned and child-directed, and designed to nurture each child’s self confidence. This approach to learning, which helps introduce children to new skills in a playful and engaging way, is supported by a growing body of research from Play for Tomorrow, the consortium behind the respected “playful learning” movement.

“We make learning enjoyable and we build in lots of opportunity for each child to experience the satisfaction of success. A key benefit of this approach to learning is its emphasis on building self-esteem and confidence as children try, and succeed at, new challenges,” said Salvatore Boccella, the owner. “A   confident child is much less likely to develop into a bully or to accept bullying from another child.”


Read More on Confidence is Best Defense Against Bullying





Face Bullying With Confidence

Walk With Awareness, Calm, Respect, and Confidence


People are less likely to be picked on and more likely to be listened to if they walk, sit, and act with awareness, calm, respect, and confidence. This means keeping one's head up, back straight, taking brisk steps, looking around, having a peaceful face and body, noticing what is happening around you, and moving away from people who might cause trouble.
Show your kid the differences between acting passive, aggressive and assertive in body language, tone of voice, and choice of words. Coach your child to walk across the floor, coaching her or him to be successful, by saying for example; "That's great!" "Now take bigger steps", "Look around you" "Straighten your back." etc.






















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